Should you ask someone about their credit score or debt on a date? Considering the fact that arguments about money are a top predictor of divorce, it may not be such a bad idea to kick off your relationships on the right financial foot.
A survey by Credit Karma showed that 66% of Americans who have used a dating app say it’s important that their partner has a good credit score. Half of Americans who have used a dating app, or who are open to using one, wish they could filter potential dates by financial status.
With student loan debt at an all-time high, it’s understandable that young adults are more willing to discuss finances than previous generations — even on the first date. In fact, a 2024 survey from the Achieve Center for Consumer Insights showed that 64% of respondents said they wouldn’t want to date someone with a lot of debt.
Young adults today are coping with the largest burden of student debt than any previous generation, along with persisting high inflation and interest rates. It’s no wonder money is on their mind — it’s an important consideration when choosing a partner.
If you’re a Millennial or Gen Z, what do you need to know about finances? Here are ways to determine if the person you’re dating has a responsible attitude when it comes to debt, credit and finances.
Are they a responsible borrower?
When discussing where you went to school, it’s very common to bring up the subject of student loans and how you’re coping with debt. As they say, misery loves company. You can each share tips and resources that have worked for you. Create a bonding moment out of something you both may be struggling with and learn a few tricks along the way.
Are they living within their means?
One way to cope with debt is to make sure you’re not taking on more. Perhaps after you’ve dated for a while, you’ll feel confident enough to bring this topic up, but this is something you may also be able to pick up on in conversations. As your relationship gets more serious, you should be more open to sharing your savings plan, goals, and debt. Being the first person to share can also help your partner feel more at ease.
Do they know and understand their credit score?
Your credit score reveals how potential lenders see you. Traditional credit score models don’t consider the fact that while Millennials and Gen Z may have higher assets and income, they are reluctant to take on more debt due to their student loan burden. This may result in less credit history or a “thinner” credit file.
A fun tip to share with your date: the VantageScore model assesses younger borrowers more fairly. Over 27 billion VantageScore credit scores were used in 2023, and you — and your date — can get your free VantageScore credit score on our website.
Do they think about the future?
Your date may be surprised when you ask how they imagine their retirement, but this can be a great indicator of their financial mindset. If your date sports a flashy wardrobe but gives no thought to the future — or assumes they’ll be wealthy enough to retire at 50 with no current plan — they may not be thinking it through. See if they have similar retirement goals as you. Keep the conversation light and breezy. You’re just getting to know each other, and it’s okay if they have a different financial mindset than you. You can only control your own actions.
Knowing how someone handles their finances can be an indicator of their maturity level and their character. Do they take responsibility for their obligations, or are they just winging it? How far you decide to commit in the relationship may largely depend on what you discover about their attitudes toward money.
Understanding your debt situation is the first step toward planning for the future.
